I hate using the word “anxiety”.
I hate using the word “anxiety”. If I’m being honest, I feel like it’s become a colloquial term for normal feelings of nervousness or anticipation. It’s been thrown around so much on social media that many of us have begun talking ourselves into the idea that we actually suffer from it.
For the record, I’m sympathetic to the sincere cases of anxiety or depression that keep many people from performing normal activities of daily living. This isn’t about that. This isn’t about dismissing the idea that some of us actually suffer from these illnesses.
It’s just about reframing how we talk about these illnesses, our emotions, and how we talk to ourselves.
I don’t allow myself to claim anxiety. I don’t want to take away from the people that actually have to deal with it’s crushing severity. However, I believe that I have only experienced short seasons of what it might feel like.
In 2017, when I was in the process leading up to the separation from my first business, I physically could not function. I remember trying to power through this season of my life, but I couldn’t even lift 5-pound weights at the gym. I felt shortness of breath even as I was sitting quietly and still, my pulse was constantly thumping ad hot in my neck.
Getting out of bed wasn’t something that I could easily do, nor is it something I wanted to do. This lasted for about two months and I had to work hard through my own self-talk habits and meditation before finally hiring a professional to help me move past it.
The most recent season was in 2018, in May. For the life of me couldn’t sleep for weeks. I was still able to exercise and perform my work but I was clouded and unfocused. No matter how much meditation, journaling, or exercise I did I would be up all night feeling angry and frustrated. I’d start cursing to myself in bed because I couldn’t turn my mind off. I remember trying to go to bed night after night, worried that I wouldn’t fall asleep again, and low and behold — I wouldn’t.
It became so bad that my feelings of unease manifested itself physically. I was breaking out in hives — although to this day I still swear that it was just the laundry detergent because again — I won’t allow myself to claim an illness that many people truly suffer from.
This season lasted about four weeks.
Those experiences freaked me out, to be honest. I identify myself as a very strong-minded individual — so how could I have felt those things that I almost pride myself on rising above on almost a daily basis? It didn’t make sense. I thought I believed I was stronger than those feelings.
The thing is, I’ve chosen a pretty stress-filled life with a lot of responsibilities. I’m definitely not complaining, it’s just the fact of the matter. The weight of building a business while running it is unique, for sure — but it’s just relative to the challenges face on a day to day basis. Because we all face daily pressures, seasons of anxiousness and sadness, I truly believe it’s essential for us to reframe how we approach our emotions.
This last week I wanted to dive deeper into these ideas so I invited Dr. Natalie Zaragoza onto my podcast to clear some things up or us. She spoke to us about identifying sincere, clinical cases of anxiety and depression, and shared some natural ways to cope with them. I play fair though, and I asked her to pick apart the idea of being overly positive. There are some topics we unpack that might actually make some people upset.
I believe everything needs balance and healthy perspectives. It’s a great episode and it’s linked below if you want to listen in.
I’ve also included a video from Mel Robbins this week that gives one way to deal with a panic attack. It’s something practical that I thought you might find useful.
You see, as we continue to grow and become more self-aware — I believe it’s essential to start reframing how we talk about our feelings and our emotions so we can have power over them instead of letting them control us. I hope this content starts to help.
